Thursday, October 15, 2009

Wanted: Evil Musicians for Evil Band

Warning***Evil Bill Y Post***Warning***Evil Bill Y Post***

Hello sad pathetic losers, Evil Bill Y here and you all make me sick. I am so fed up with this fairy tale nonsense. It won't be long now before Halloween and the ‘Big Event' will kick off. People are too nice to each other and that just isn’t evil. I’m here to tell you that it stops right here. It’s Evil time and I’m putting together an Evil band. So far I have:

Vocals: “Massively Mental” Mick Slasher.
Guitars: “Wielding Axe” Anto Murphy
Bass: Evil Bill Y
Drums: “Kneecap Ned” O’Leary

If you’re evil and you can play an instrument, email me at evilbastard@itsbleedingreattomock.com
If you’re not evil, don’t waste my time or I’ll get Kneecap Ned to have a few words with you and you really don’t want to meet that dude ‘cause he’s as Evil as me and he does his job with a smile on his face.

We’ve only a couple of songs written so far but they’re pure Evil. My favourite is one that Wielding Axe wrote. It’s called ‘She’ll be coming down the mountain when I whack her on the head with my axe’. It’s a love song that brings tears of joy to my Evil face when we play it. Kneecap Ned is also into love songs and he wrote ‘I’m back, remember me, I’m the one who stole your legs’. I told him that some of the lyrics sound a bit familiar. There’s one line that goes ‘It wasn’t me who lost control, you’re face to face with the man who stole your limbs’ – pure poetry.

Enough already, I don’t have time to spend with you losers. If you’re Evil, you can get me at the above email address. If you’re not Evil, you can go to hell for all I care. Evil Bill Y

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