Unclean Alan & Colour-blind Johnny

I don't make a lot of sense because sense is overrated and overstated. I do speak a lot of nonsense and for that I'll never apologise. Purple, barney, dinosaur. Unclean Alan didn't get his name because he didn't wash himself. He got his name because he's a deep down 'n' dirty, underhanded, son of a mother with the manners of an unprincipled Bon Jovi fan's t-shirt. 5 years ago, Unclean Alan told Colour-blind Johnny a lie and to this day, he believes it’s true: