This makes about as much sense as two old bald men fighting over an electric pencil sharpener in a lighthouse during a windstorm.

Sometimes this stuff seems to write itself. If Thirsty Dave sees a pub, off-licence or even a picture of beer, it’s reasonable to assume that he’s going to want a beer. If you or any of your friends attempt to force religion down my throat, it’s reasonable to assume that you’ve lost before you begin. Dave and Rebecca Kosmitis are two people who have a total different handle on reality than Thirsty Dave or I have: