Cash reward, no questions asked

A massively confused man was massively confused. That massively confused man was me. The chocolate bar wrapper blatantly lied and claimed there were raisins within but raisins where nowhere to be found. I wasn’t sure if I should call the police or not, so I did. They were no help at all and said something about no crime having been committed. I was as shocked as a shock absorber, at such a blasé attitude. This world is in the state it’s in, precisely because of lies like this and I let my feelings be known by telling them that this world is in the state it’s in, precisely because of lies like this. I don’t know why but they said I was drunk. I told them I was not drunk but full of alcohol. I asked them if they had any news on the theft of my pet chicken and wasn’t surprised when they said they didn’t so I allowed them to leave and decided to put up more posters: