Pass the blame and don’t blame me

Karma has a way of mocking you to your face in such a way that you just have to stand up and admit you've been beaten by a better force of nature. I'm always telling Jill Y that she can't cook and yesterday she cooked this amazing meal and I then came down with food poisoning. I'm always telling her that she's a bad driver and today, the car and I decided to go in two different directions. It happened while I drove to the shops to get groceries for her to poison Thirsty Dave and Scurvy Jane who are coming over for dinner tonight. I then done what any self respecting mocker would do and blamed the whole thing on a better force of nature: